Cancer is a bastard

Life has turned upside down once again. My Aunty Sandra has been very ill for quite some time now and the doctors have done numerous tests on her trying to find out what’s wrong. After being cleared for cancer a month ago, on Wednesday 2nd last week she was diagnosed with terminal cancer. It’s already too severe to treat, being in her bones, lungs & lymph nodes.

On Wednesday my brother had commented on facebook regarding getting bad news about family in the UK so I instantly got worried and messaged him. She said Aunty Sandra was in hospital and Uncle Kevin (One of Sandra & My Mum’s brothers) could tell me more. I phone him up and he told me she has cancer and it really wasn’t good. I realised how bad when he told me there weren’t going to be treating her, just making her comfortable. I cried and phoned my Mum straight away. Kevin had already called her so I knew already that she was aware of what was happening. I blubbed on the phone to her and we chatted about the possibility of her coming over right away to see Sandra, and she said she’d price up tickets. Apparenly Aunty Sadra didn’t know at this point how bad it was as when the doctors came to talk to her in hospital she told them to talk to her daughters Janine & Lorraine because she didn’t want to know. She’d figured out it was cancer already. I then phoned Janine and she was very upset and could hardly talk, so I didn’t talk for long. She told me her and Loz were going with a consultant to tell Sandra about it together the next day. I said I’d visit her on Friday night then. Friday Becky and I arranged to go see her in hospital together. She was in a lot of pain but got us to take her outside in the wheelchair for a cigarette. “Too late now anyway!” she says. Ha! After visiting her I felt somewhat better as before hand I didn’t quite know what to expect, because the first time I visited Ange when she was really ill it came as a huge shock. So I’d been preparing myself for the worst. Friday night Becky came around to ours and I got drunk. It was good.

Saturday my Mum emailed to say she’d be here on Monday, so I called my boss and booked the day off. Saturday night Becky said a lot of the family was around their house after being at the hospital, so I went around there and we all got pissed. I cycled home drunk. LOL.

Sunday was spent cleaning the flat and getting the spare room ready for my Mum’s arrival (had to replace the sodding toilet seat as it broke when I was cleaning the loo!), then visited Aunty Sandra again in hospital. She was scheduled to be released the next day to go home if they had her medication right. Her pain was being better managed but she seemed really nervous about it and kept asking the nurses when her next dose was. She was getting a bit confused and loosing bits of conversations though which was a bit upsetting, but I asked Jane about it and she said it was due to the morphine and not the cancer.

On Monday Pete, Becky & I went to pick up my Mum from Birmingham International Airport. Took her home to bath and have a cuppa then went straight over to the hospital as Sandra hadn’t yet been released. They hadn’t quite got her medication levels right so would only be allowed out on Tuesday. My Aunty Gladys and cousin Jamie with his GF Lou had also come down from Scotland that day and the arrived at the hospital soon after us. Afterwards we all went back to Aunty Sandra’s house to relax and catch up. My Mum spent the night there with Aunty Gladys and Veronica.

Tuesday Pete and I were both back at work. Mum spend the days at Sandra’s as she was being discharged from hospital. I asked for a few days off to spend time with my Mum for the short time she was here, but I was denied the full 3 days I asked for which nearly made my cry at my desk. I’m still seething about that today. After work Pete dropped me off at Aunty Sandra’s before going to nin-jutsu. I spent the evening with Mum, Janine, Lorraine, Andy & the Boys Becky, Kev & Jane, Gladys, Veronica, Jamie, Lou and Tracey, listening to them tell stories about their youth and Nan & Grandad. It was great. Had a nice cuddle with Aunty Sandra before we went home too, telling her how much I love her. The Katharine House Hospice have supplied her with a hospital bed and other equipment so she has oxygen and is all well set up at her home in the lounge, which has been turned into a makeshift bedroom; just like they did when Ange was sick.

At work again today, still in a foul mood and tired. But looking forward to getting home this evening and relaxing with everyone again. I believe we are going around to Kevin and Jane’s for supper and Becky is cooking for us. 😀